Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Love of Style

I may have mentioned this in the past.  But I still find it interesting that in some ways I seem to be reverting back to the "me" of my early-mid 20's. That "me", but much improved.  Of course I'm older, wiser (I hope) and have a better sense of who I am.

When I met Barry 17 years ago, I thought I was fat.  I didn't know what fat was back then.  I dressed well, didn't have a shoe fetish any more (I sure did when I was in my early 20's) but still liked to be put together.  I have no idea what happened, but the weight kept piling on, my back got worse and worse and a bad back and high heels don't exactly go together.  Since I couldn't wear high heels and my back hurt and the weight was piling on, I stopped dressing really well.  It's hard to put a great outfit together for not a lot of money when you're "plus" size.  To think I put on almost 80 pounds in the past 20 years shocks me.  And most of that probably went on from ages 35-42.  I kept trying to get it off and the more I tried the more I failed.  Why it's stuck this time, I'm not sure.

I do want to note however, and this is for those who perhaps have gained some weight and really want to get rid of it, that no amount of others telling you that you're gaining, or ridiculing you, or whatever, will help you rid yourself of unwanted fat.  YOU have to make up your own mind.  YOU have to tell everyone else to go to hell and that they are hurting you, not helping you.  By having others "encouraging you" and by that I mean harrassing you, it only adds to the stress.  Which in turn can put more weight on.  Some people lose weight when stressed ... if you're anything like me, I stress eat.  It's been a LONG, LONG time coming, but I think I've finally got THAT one under control.  And if you stress eat and are under stress a lot ... you do the math. 

So I would just encourage you that if you have weight to rid yourself of, try not to stress.  Eat a moderate
amount of food, small portions numerous times daily, exercise daily, even if it's walking, and take time for yourself each day.  Whether it's blogging or meditation or yoga or combining your alone time with walking, do something that is for YOU and nobody else.

Today was a tough day.  I've had 2 nights of very little sleep.  I couldn't get to sleep, then I couldn't stay asleep.  So to say I'm exhausted is putting it mildly.  I'm off to bed shortly.  I'm trying not to do this too late but of course it's 9:20 p.m. and I'm just getting my post done.

I digress ... yet again.  I came across a great blog today "Style Artisan" who I'm now following.  She's actually in my age bracket, classy, classy looking woman whose sense of style is fabulous.  Youthful without looking like she's trying to look 20 again.  'Cauz let's face it.  When you're over 40, no matter how youthful and fit you are, trying to look 20 again ... just isn't attractive.  I believe in dressing youthfully, stylishly, but appropriate for one's age.  I've seen 60 year old women who are knockouts.  Their sense of style is amazing, they are obviously mature, but they obviously take care of themselves.  That's what I want to look like I when I grow up.  LOL

I also came across a fabulous quote "Fashions Fade, Style is Eternal".  I love it, I love it, I love it.  I've never been one to follow trends or fads.  Maybe the odd piece but in general, I believe in finding your style, keeping it updated, but staying true to who you are and your lifestyle.  Not everything works for everyone.

I am so happy to see that style is about making the most of who you are, not just following along with the masses.  Jennifer, you always seem to put together some great outfits; stuff I would never think to put together ... but that's YOUR sense of style.  And it works for you. 

Barry and I were talking about Christmas presents.  I suggested In Style's "Guide to Style".  In the process, I came across a book by Tim Gunn (I LOVE HIS SHOW!), one by Clinton Stacey (looks fab) and even one by Carmondy (who always looks sensational).  How to choose???  I guess I'll just have to start collecting.

Did I mention my latest addiction ... jewellery.  OMG!  Now I must admit, I only wear one designer's jewellery.  She just happens to be my sister (and her daughter so I guess it's actually two designers).  I have such a hard time controlling myself.  There's just so much great stuff!

Anyway, I'm falling asleep so I'm going to make hay while the sun shines so to speak.  Rock on ladies!  And don't forget to stay true to yourself.  And everyone else can just take a flying leap at themselves if they don't like it.

Yours always, in style and in fitness,


  1. Wow...two great writers, who aren't afraid to speak from their hearts, all in one family. That is so cool!

    Thanks so much for the endorsement! It is a daunting task starting a new blog. There are millions of blogs out there and the first task is to decide that your voice is unique enough to rise above the crescendo of daily posts. The second task is to realize that even if it doesn’t, that what you have to say matters. Then you must move forward and express yourself, even if no one ever sees it.

    But, it is really, really cool when someone not only takes the time to visit, but also communicates their appreciation. Thank you to both you and Barry! (Please tell him for me.)

    I feel blessed to have "met" you and Barry today. I commend you on your journey and I look forward to celebrating your successes with you!


  2. oh i love this post. I just did a bunch of stress eating. Im not happy about it but tomorrow is another day. My friends tried to be encouraging before I lost about 20 pounds but one in particular didn't realize she was harrasing me. She used to be like Oh you really don't need to eat that do you just to let you know. She was a skinny twig. Oops sry im rambling.

    I haven't been sleeping much either, probably stress. Your right about style. You gotta have your own style & whatever it is, is unique cuz it's urs. =) Jennifer is fabulous in her style!!

    I'm totally going to check out those books. I love Tim Gun & Carmondie. I hope your feeling less stressed as the holidays near. Sleep is part of a feeling better. I'm going to take your advice & try to get to bed reasonably. =)

  3. I stress eat too. People always use the term "comfort food" and that's what food is to me some time. :S When I'm happy, I don't eat as much. I'm so distracted with being content that food seems like an after thought. It looks like in order for me to seriously start shedding the pounds, I'm going to have to make some life changes first. I can't see any other way. But that makes the situation even more difficult. :(

    Thanks for the compliment. :) I have gotten more brave with my fashion creativity in the past year. I think being poor has forced me to make choices I would not have normally made before, which is kind of cool. And I am definitely going to have to check out those books you mentioned. I'm so busy trying to read novels, I forget to pay attention to fashion books. One of my favorite fashion books is called "Eccentric Glamour" by Simon Doonan. That is another book that inspired me to take more risks and simply not care about what other people think. Dress for yourself and no one else! :)

    I hope you start getting more sleep soon!! And I hope you are having a great week, Sandy. You really deserve it!

  4. I just have to say that you make such a wonderful point here...people can badger you for years about your weight; but if your desire to lose isn't internal, and of your own volition, no motivation will ever present itself. The moment you decide to make the change for you, you are achieving the first step towards success.

    I admire you, Sandy, I truly do!! :)

  5. Hey,

    Thanks for stopping by!! I love coming across new blogs.

    I just told a client of mine, who lost 70 lbs to impress her husband, who ended up cheating on her with her best friend that you have to snap out of it and do it for you and block any and everything else out.

    I lost weight last year, and you're right-it wasn't my moms semi-rude comments that motivated me AT ALL. That actually pissed me off more than anything because she thought she was being supportive and "honest"..what motivated me was good health. Something in me snapped and I said, I just can't do this anymore. I have to be healthy.

    I wish you the best and come back to Dina's Days again!