Monday, January 25, 2010


"The meaning of life is to live a meaningful life." author unknown

We received word today that one of our consultants, who was visiting family in the Phillipines, died of a heart attack.  He was only in his 50's.  My heart goes out to his family.  I only hope that his wife and children (if any) were with him and not here.  I really don't know much about him ... only dealt with him a few times.

But this news had provoked a comment from one of my teammates.  She said "if you're born human, you're cursed".  She said humans are born to die.  I laughed.  I didn't mean to be flip or disrespectful.   Her statement simply caught me off guard and that's unfortunately how I react sometimes.  She got a little testy and was quite serious.  She's been going through, I don't know what the last few months.  Maybe it's perimenopause.  Maybe one of her family members if very sick.  I don't know.  I mean, we've worked together for 4 years now.  We've been through a LOT together.  I wish she would talk to me.  But her ramblings are getting challenging to follow.  I've asked her a few times if everything is ok; she says yes. 

Apparently she wasn't happy with her review or her bonus.  Hell, I was shocked we even GOT one.  Especially since we're an American owned company and 2009 was not kind to the real estate market, although commercial (that's what I'm in) fared somewhat better.  I just thrilled ... was it an awesome bonus ... of course not.  Will it help pay for some stuff?  Absolutely.  Hence my little shopping spree.  And I know, I know, I still have to post outfit pics.  Unfortunately living up here in the great white north we don't get a whole lotta sunshine.  It's pretty much dark when I leave and dark when I get back from work.  I promise .. this weekend.

But I digress (shocking I know)She asked me if I believe in Karma.  I suppose to some extent I do, in that what goes around comes around.  I think you get what you give.  Maybe not right away, but eventually things will catch up with you, good or bad.

My main philosophy though is, yes, we're born and eventually we're all gonna die.  But man, what's in between is what we make it.  We can choose to be fatalistic and to worry about the future, about stuff that may or may not happen (jobs, health, whatever) and be negative or you can choose to live life to its fullest.  To be the best possible you that you can be.  To be someone you want to know; someone you want in your life.

I'm perplexed her by attitude.  I don't understand.  Perhaps I didn't give her a chance to explain.  But she's become so dogmatic about things, so confrontational, I don't get it.  She's always been so nice.  She's been a lot of fun.  I miss my old teammate.  Of course I've changed a lot in the past year, but I know it's for the better.  I went through a LOT of crap for a couple of years.

But all I can do now is be me.  Happy, content, full of life and love and hope for the future, that things will get better all around for everyone.  Is there a lot of suffering in this world?  Of course.  Do I feel for these people?  Of course I do.  Would I make their lives better if I could?  You bet.  But I can't let things that I have no control over run (and ruin) my life.

Perhaps our consultant's death is a reminder to us to live life to its fullest.  To laugh and rejoice and to treat each other with love and respect.  I'm not sure what's gotten into me lately.  I have been SO emotional ... good and bad.  I teared up reading Jennifer's last comment (here I go just thinking about it); Barry's last post was awesome.  If you don't follow him and want to watch something joyous, click here.  And of course there's Haiti.  That makes me cry a lot when I watch footage. 

So I do what I can to make people's lives a little brighter.  You, my blogging friends, make my life a lot brighter.  I look forward to your posts and your comments. 

And Diane, great comment on my last post.  You are one of the classiest, most awesome people I've "met" in a long time.  You are my inspiration.


  1. There's so much beauty in life if we look for it. There's so much wonder if we embrace it, instead of fearing the unknown. Your teammate felt that we're cursed as humans because we're self-aware, cognizant of our mortality. I see this as a gift, a reminder to ourselves that (especially as we get older) we should make the most of what we have.

    Most of us can't say we live every minute of every day to the fullest. I can't. But we should never take our time on Earth forgranted. I want to be someone who can look back and say not only was I thankful for the people I knew in my life, but that I was able to make a difference in theirs.


  2. Some people are just like that. They are very clear cut & dry & just say the facts & for whatever reason they may seem cold. Yes we all will die but I don't dwell on it. If you spend all your time knowing that you won't enjoy life. I'm sorry to hear about your consultant. May he rest in peace.

  3. I am so sorry to hear about your consultant. I will keep his family in my prayers.

    But I am perhaps more sorry to hear about your co-worker. Her attitude is poisoning her life and will become a vicious, self-fulfilling prophecy.

    What is important for you to remember is that you can't change other people.

    If she chooses to live her life like that then don't let her poison your life at the same time. You have to put on what I call your "Teflon raincoat" when you are around her so that all that negative energy just slides right off you. Otherwise, she will suck the joy right out of you!

    Thanks so much for your kind words. I feel the same way about you and Barry. I wish ya'll (good southern word) didn't live so far away. I would love to have dinner one night and really get to know one another!

  4. I'm very sorry to hear about your consultant.

    The quote you posted is lovely.

  5. I love how inspirational this blog is! Keep it up :))


    Meg @

  6. Some people just seem to gravitate towards negativity naturally. Whether it's a born trait or acquired is something we can debate forever, or some people might find it easier to be negative. It is very easy to do, more of a battle to be positive at least for me. But I'm choosing to fight and see the positive and banish negativity. You're right, all you can be is yourself. This was a really great post , and I enjoy it very much.